I am feeling extremely blessed at the moment and I am feeling called to share my mind.
.
This morning was tough. I hit a peak in emotion. This seems to happen during my "monthly" time, when I haven't expressed myself enough during the month and I need to get it out. Yet instead of it being constructive or helpful in my communication, I lash out. I forget what IS and I focus on what I think the negatives are in my life. I am blinded by them and I literally forget the purpose for which my life is lived for.
.
When days like today happen, my experience of my life shifts to seeing everything as dark and without answer. I experience lack and self hate. Feeling doubt, confused and sad. I project this hate on my partner.
.
As my day progresses, what happens for me Thank God, is that I blatantly notice the intensity of how I feel. I realize I do not like how I feel and that I don't want to feel this way.
.
I seek to change this state and know I can because I have learned that "I am responsible for how I feel and what I think." I also realize that my emotions are an effect of my thinking, so I ask in these times to be conscious of what I AM thinking so I can change my thoughts.
.
I affirm my responsibility and willingness to look at my thoughts.....and slowly, as the energy calms down... I become open to talking about it... and thats when the change starts to happen....
.
This morning was tough. I hit a peak in emotion. This seems to happen during my "monthly" time, when I haven't expressed myself enough during the month and I need to get it out. Yet instead of it being constructive or helpful in my communication, I lash out. I forget what IS and I focus on what I think the negatives are in my life. I am blinded by them and I literally forget the purpose for which my life is lived for.
.
When days like today happen, my experience of my life shifts to seeing everything as dark and without answer. I experience lack and self hate. Feeling doubt, confused and sad. I project this hate on my partner.
.
As my day progresses, what happens for me Thank God, is that I blatantly notice the intensity of how I feel. I realize I do not like how I feel and that I don't want to feel this way.
.
I seek to change this state and know I can because I have learned that "I am responsible for how I feel and what I think." I also realize that my emotions are an effect of my thinking, so I ask in these times to be conscious of what I AM thinking so I can change my thoughts.
.
I affirm my responsibility and willingness to look at my thoughts.....and slowly, as the energy calms down... I become open to talking about it... and thats when the change starts to happen....
The way I began to express these thoughts to myself was the following....
In the morning after I already noticed irritation, I began writing out my thoughts in my journal. The dark ones that gripped me with guilt. I wrote them all out. I was honest, raw and real. I knew no one would see it and so it was OK to be so honest.
.
I then gained a bit of courage and reached out to a friend. He listened to me as I talked my thoughts out and he made me feel safe to express them. I shared similar thought as in my journal and yet telling him let me see how innocent I am in his eyes. And that I need not feel bad for the space I was in.
.
Then I went for a hike with my family. We pushed Ella in her stroller for most of the time...and Tom and I got to have a nice long conversation.
.
Since I already concluded I am responsible and I am ready to change my mind here, I mentioned my thoughts and where I was at emotionally to Tom, but I also listened. I let him speak too so I could understand. Listening is so very important also, when we are in a rough patch. Because often when we have let ourselves sink into the dark, we cannot see, and we need some one else to help us.
.
I realized through our conversation, how much I tell myself Tom doesn't listen to me. That he doesn't hear me and he thinks I am wrong. The closer I looked, the more I saw that when I say that, its because I am not listening to me and I think I AM wrong. Since I think I am wrong, I doubt, don't listen and project it out onto Tom. Here in, the cycle begins.
.
On our 2 hour hike I dropped those ideas and defenses, and talked honestly about all my thoughts and also truly listened. I then saw how much he really does listen to me and really does want me to be happy. And he gave me the space to express myself fully and I felt heard. It was helpful and impactful.
.
Our day ended celebrating Tom. My Dad and Effie took us out for amazing Indian Food and ice-cream to celebrate Toms belated birthday. It was perfect.
.
I then put Ella to sleep and whisked out the door by 830 for sunset. I snapped the picture above.
.
I got to walk..and think.. And listen... And pray.
.
I saw that when I slip into darkness I am choosing not to see the ever present logos...love.... that IS here and very active in my life. Its black and white... illusion or reality... there is no in between.
.
My life is loving creative purposeful and happy on most days which IS Reality in my Life and In the "Kingdom" of Eternity. I have richness of Self and Purpose and see a clear vision of the map for my life, and I see it as given me as a gift and guide post for how to live a truly happy life on earth.
.
I saw through talking out my thoughts that all my suffering came from that, separate goals. The a course in miracles says "Doubt is the result of conflicting wishes". If we are not conflicted in what we want, we will not doubt, without doubt we will not suffer. Questioning what we think we want, is the only way to bring Reason too it and truly ask if that's what we are wanting and if it will benefit me and ALL or not. If it wont positively benefit ALL, its not true. And its not a goal or want worthy of my time or thoughts.
.
The more we remember this, the more we heal and the more we are happy. I am happy right now because I actively chose differently. In my choice FOR peace, I have remembered what my life is for and I have remembered God. Yet this morning, I forgot all that. And in my forgetting I was blind and felt hurt and so I "hurt" others.
.
This goes for ALL people on planet earth. No-one is outside the laws of mind or the universe. When we believe our thoughts of fear OVER the thoughts of God/Love we WILL suffer. The end. Yet suffering is GONE when we let Gods Wholly Loving Thoughts replace our own. When Love enters, we can forgive, and forgiveness brings us Vision, Understanding & Peace.
.
"God is my source and I cannot see apart from Him" I heard in my mind on my walk. I let his Love and His Peace fill me. I cried, I laughed, I thanked God. It was healing and powerful and I saw how these thoughts and actions of lack and darkness extend from what I accepted as true in childhood. And even though they popped up in my life, that I am not guilty for them... I am responsible. And in my responsibility I can change them.
.
I am grateful to have a universal corrective agent in my mind. And I am responsible for using it. It is the Mind of Reason....the Mind of Love.....the Mind of Spirit that we can TRUST. This voice is in all of us, and when we are really, truly, ready to step off the cycle of suffering we WILL, and this voice will be here to comfort us, teach us, love us and offer us the forgiveness we have forgot.
.
If I can express anything here, its that we NEED NOT SUFFER. We need not be in pain. It is active and every where on this planet at this time.... so of course we must ADMIT it when we feel it.... we cannot deny it if we feel pain.... but we need not feel guilty for it or hopeless. There is a way to end the suffering in our own minds.
.
If we all can remember, even in the tough times, or at least as soon as we get off the high of the tough parts..... to listen to this Voice reason....take our projections off each other....to talk and listen to each other.....and to be willing to listen within (to both to the cruel thoughts and to the blessed ones)....we then place ourselves in a position where we can CHOOSE what we want and what voice we want to listen too.... so we can live happy and free, in service to each other and our world.
.
Choosing Truth or the Voice for Love does not mean we will not make mistakes. It means we will apply correction when we make mistakes. It does not matter how many times we fall, or how many times we drift away in our minds.... what matters is that we stand up! That we come back!! What matters is correcting our mistakes so we do not keep making them!
.
The LOVE that is in my heart now, I give it all of you. So that whenever you are having a rough day like I had today, that you can remember that you have the power to change your mind.
.
When the dust settles, let your self go for a stroll, or a meditation or a yoga practice, so you can turn your mind within and hear the Great Voice of peace remind you of your power and perfection (and the power and perfection of others). In choosing to do this, we are also choosing to live in the ANSWER to the problems we experience in life and we will bring to us the practical answers to provide for our every need and to solve our every problem. Peace be to us all. May we all hand over our lack-of-peace for correction today.
.
.
#happy #free #correction #truth #InclusionOfAll #peace #reason #acim #God #Spirit #logos #love #healing #vision #philosophy #power
In the morning after I already noticed irritation, I began writing out my thoughts in my journal. The dark ones that gripped me with guilt. I wrote them all out. I was honest, raw and real. I knew no one would see it and so it was OK to be so honest.
.
I then gained a bit of courage and reached out to a friend. He listened to me as I talked my thoughts out and he made me feel safe to express them. I shared similar thought as in my journal and yet telling him let me see how innocent I am in his eyes. And that I need not feel bad for the space I was in.
.
Then I went for a hike with my family. We pushed Ella in her stroller for most of the time...and Tom and I got to have a nice long conversation.
.
Since I already concluded I am responsible and I am ready to change my mind here, I mentioned my thoughts and where I was at emotionally to Tom, but I also listened. I let him speak too so I could understand. Listening is so very important also, when we are in a rough patch. Because often when we have let ourselves sink into the dark, we cannot see, and we need some one else to help us.
.
I realized through our conversation, how much I tell myself Tom doesn't listen to me. That he doesn't hear me and he thinks I am wrong. The closer I looked, the more I saw that when I say that, its because I am not listening to me and I think I AM wrong. Since I think I am wrong, I doubt, don't listen and project it out onto Tom. Here in, the cycle begins.
.
On our 2 hour hike I dropped those ideas and defenses, and talked honestly about all my thoughts and also truly listened. I then saw how much he really does listen to me and really does want me to be happy. And he gave me the space to express myself fully and I felt heard. It was helpful and impactful.
.
Our day ended celebrating Tom. My Dad and Effie took us out for amazing Indian Food and ice-cream to celebrate Toms belated birthday. It was perfect.
.
I then put Ella to sleep and whisked out the door by 830 for sunset. I snapped the picture above.
.
I got to walk..and think.. And listen... And pray.
.
I saw that when I slip into darkness I am choosing not to see the ever present logos...love.... that IS here and very active in my life. Its black and white... illusion or reality... there is no in between.
.
My life is loving creative purposeful and happy on most days which IS Reality in my Life and In the "Kingdom" of Eternity. I have richness of Self and Purpose and see a clear vision of the map for my life, and I see it as given me as a gift and guide post for how to live a truly happy life on earth.
.
I saw through talking out my thoughts that all my suffering came from that, separate goals. The a course in miracles says "Doubt is the result of conflicting wishes". If we are not conflicted in what we want, we will not doubt, without doubt we will not suffer. Questioning what we think we want, is the only way to bring Reason too it and truly ask if that's what we are wanting and if it will benefit me and ALL or not. If it wont positively benefit ALL, its not true. And its not a goal or want worthy of my time or thoughts.
.
The more we remember this, the more we heal and the more we are happy. I am happy right now because I actively chose differently. In my choice FOR peace, I have remembered what my life is for and I have remembered God. Yet this morning, I forgot all that. And in my forgetting I was blind and felt hurt and so I "hurt" others.
.
This goes for ALL people on planet earth. No-one is outside the laws of mind or the universe. When we believe our thoughts of fear OVER the thoughts of God/Love we WILL suffer. The end. Yet suffering is GONE when we let Gods Wholly Loving Thoughts replace our own. When Love enters, we can forgive, and forgiveness brings us Vision, Understanding & Peace.
.
"God is my source and I cannot see apart from Him" I heard in my mind on my walk. I let his Love and His Peace fill me. I cried, I laughed, I thanked God. It was healing and powerful and I saw how these thoughts and actions of lack and darkness extend from what I accepted as true in childhood. And even though they popped up in my life, that I am not guilty for them... I am responsible. And in my responsibility I can change them.
.
I am grateful to have a universal corrective agent in my mind. And I am responsible for using it. It is the Mind of Reason....the Mind of Love.....the Mind of Spirit that we can TRUST. This voice is in all of us, and when we are really, truly, ready to step off the cycle of suffering we WILL, and this voice will be here to comfort us, teach us, love us and offer us the forgiveness we have forgot.
.
If I can express anything here, its that we NEED NOT SUFFER. We need not be in pain. It is active and every where on this planet at this time.... so of course we must ADMIT it when we feel it.... we cannot deny it if we feel pain.... but we need not feel guilty for it or hopeless. There is a way to end the suffering in our own minds.
.
If we all can remember, even in the tough times, or at least as soon as we get off the high of the tough parts..... to listen to this Voice reason....take our projections off each other....to talk and listen to each other.....and to be willing to listen within (to both to the cruel thoughts and to the blessed ones)....we then place ourselves in a position where we can CHOOSE what we want and what voice we want to listen too.... so we can live happy and free, in service to each other and our world.
.
Choosing Truth or the Voice for Love does not mean we will not make mistakes. It means we will apply correction when we make mistakes. It does not matter how many times we fall, or how many times we drift away in our minds.... what matters is that we stand up! That we come back!! What matters is correcting our mistakes so we do not keep making them!
.
The LOVE that is in my heart now, I give it all of you. So that whenever you are having a rough day like I had today, that you can remember that you have the power to change your mind.
.
When the dust settles, let your self go for a stroll, or a meditation or a yoga practice, so you can turn your mind within and hear the Great Voice of peace remind you of your power and perfection (and the power and perfection of others). In choosing to do this, we are also choosing to live in the ANSWER to the problems we experience in life and we will bring to us the practical answers to provide for our every need and to solve our every problem. Peace be to us all. May we all hand over our lack-of-peace for correction today.
.
.
#happy #free #correction #truth #InclusionOfAll #peace #reason #acim #God #Spirit #logos #love #healing #vision #philosophy #power